Feeling overwhelmed by your child’s behavior?
We will teach you how to take back parental control! One of the secrets to successful parenting is to use certain communication and discipline strategies consistently and in a prescribed order. This consistent sequence is the key to improvement and kids know that you are serious about better behavior. Your child will listen more effectively and take your commands more seriously. With improved compliance at home, he will perform better at school and get along better with his peers, with adults and with family.
Parenting Counseling teaches you to avoid the “push me, pull me” interactions with your child. You will learn the six secrets to converting defiance to compliance. We will teach you how to eliminate embarrassing public breakdowns and showdowns. Repairing conflict by setting clear and consistent limits will reduce family turmoil and allow you to build emotional intimacy with your child.
At Gearing Up!, parents learn the professional secrets about timeouts, communication cues and behavioral/privilege restrictions that work every time. In addition, parents learn which positive behaviors to reward and how to make the rewards maximally effective.
Parenting in the Age of Indulgence
Narcissism is a national epidemic.
Our children are growing up in a society that emphasizes performance over character and wealth over honesty and morality. Parenting has never been more challenging as we strive to teach our children the self-discipline, self-confidence and resilience they must have to be competent adults.
All too often, they witness the opportunistic behavior of peers, the self aggrandizement of our celebrities and the injustice of a tough business market. To make matters worse, the self-importance of the twentysomething generation is a confusing tidal wave of influence. If they compete for narcissistic attention, they join a legion of self-possessed and directionless peers. If they fail to compete, they may feel marginalized socially. All this confusion delays their transition into stable adulthood.
As a result, too many kids in their late teens and twenties take a full decade to grow up rather than developing adult coping skills that help them separate and individuate.
We specialize in helping parents take back their empowerment with their kids and set new boundaries while maintaining a loving, but firm stance.
Parents will be guided through:
- Why an entire generation is more blessed than any generation in history but has the highest rates of clinical depression
- How “twenty five” (years old) is the new “fifteen”: Why kids are taking so long to grow up and how boomer parents over parent.
- Setting tough limits when other parents fail to impose any limits.
- Finding the fine line between preaching and mentoring
- Teaching humility, compassion, and faithfulness in the age of indulgence
- Helping your child to learn emotional self control, self discipline and responsibility.
- Helping older teens and twentysomethings find a path out of childhood and dependence.
- Setting boundaries without guilt or regret
- Call off the rescuing—How helicopter parents need to back off
- Emotional Intelligence for a Lifetime
Father Child Relationships
We believe that fathers have never been more important in the life of a young child.
The role of the father is pivotal in creating self-esteem and empowerment in his children. His leadership in the family is vital in creating security and boundaries. However our society provides little guidance on how men can optimize their parenting with their children.
A father is usually his child’s first playmate, his protector, his guide to the world of business and leadership, his first mentor in academics and in sports, his first advocate in achievement and the first one to miss him when he leaves for college.
A father is vital to his child’s positive development in the following areas:
- Creates his son’s and daughter’s first beliefs about men
- He is their first playmate, their chief protector and guide to the world
- A father is usually his child’s mentor in the business and professional worlds.
- He is the first male to lead them spiritually and morally.
- Dads are often the intellectual coaches and the cheerleaders of achievement
- Fathers demonstrate respect and honoring of their mother
- Teaches Self Discipline and Building Self Reliance.
- Helps to Develop resourcefulness and problem solving under stress.
- Enhances Appropriate Body Image Development
- Increases Self Confidence, Academic Empowerment and Self-Initiative professionally
- A father is one of the first people to welcome his son or daughter into the world and remains one of their staunchest supporters throughout their life.
Our Father-Child Counseling focuses on all of these areas. We teach strategies, techniques and coping skills that will enhance and strengthen all of these parenting responsibilities.
Mother Child Relationships
“The Hand That Rocks the Cradle is the Hand that Rules the World”
-William Ross Wallace
We know from clinical practice and from thousands of studies that a mother’s positive role in a child’s life can fortify that child against countless heartbreaks, the temptations of peer pressures and self-destructive behaviors in relationships and in self-management. A mother is usually the “front line” parent. Her stewardship of her child’s welfare can create a lifelong belief that he can handle anything he encounters. Such beliefs determine epic life decisions such as professional choice, mate selection and demonstrating hardiness in adversity.
Women are often taught by our society that their daughters and sons must abruptly separate emotionally to become fully realized individuals. While mothers remain involved in overseeing achievements such as sports or college admissions, the authentic emotional connection between a mother and her children is compromised, neglected or diminished. Growing up is the equivalent of saying goodbye to a sacred connection. The psychological outcome can be devastating for both parties.
At Gearing Up it is our belief that a mother’s love is invaluable in setting the stage for a lifetime of self-confidence, personal effectiveness, empathy and emotional intelligence.
Her enduring connection and steady advocacy of her adult child maximizes the child’s ability to achieve in relationships, in parenting and in the professional arena. However, she must learn to not hover but to enhance her child’s journey into adulthood.
Many of us do not understand the fundamentals of effective mothering, especially as our children are increasingly independent. We may have been reared by mothers whom we are reluctant to model.
We either "over parent" (helicopter parenting) or “under-parent.”
We may mistakenly believe that our older child is in need of our constant input and guidance. At the other extreme (under-parenting), we are convinced that he is incapable of assuming responsibilities for which he is unprepared. Either polarity can lead to a tumultuous passage for mothers and their kids.
At Gearing Up, we specialize in coaching concerned mothers in how to become maximally effective parents through a series of sessions focusing on reestablishing their parenting confidence, increasing their own understanding of their feelings about parenting and helping them rewrite their parenting story with their own child. Creating a new vision of their parenting, they will become more decisive, maintain better boundaries and negotiate conflict effectively.
Most importantly, we teach mothers to trust themselves, to maintain realistic, loving expectations of others and to focus on the incredible positives in their children.